Many of the trailers this week deal with films that are truly the sign of the apocalypse.

1. Emo Vampire Teen Book Written by Mormon Gets Movie Deal?—Twilight: The final trailer for the big teen book seller has been put up online. The verdict? O Jeez…Written by a Mormon woman, this book series really represents cheese to a level that JK Rowling would never understand. The movie, looks like an even worse idea—forced romance, silly special effects, and emo? Stay away at all costs. (November 21st)
Watch the trailer here

2. Jean Claude Van Damme makes a good movie?—JCVD: As the festival season begins to wrap up, one film that isn’t getting a lot of Oscar buzz, but getting a lot of buzz, sounds like the most insane movie of the year. Mr. B-movie star, Jean Claude Van Damme plays himself as a falling action star, who needs money. So what does he do? Decides to rob the bank. Van Damme has been praised for an awesome meta-role, and this film looks like hilarious fun. (November 7th)
Check out the trailer here

3. 50 Cent can direct, write, act, and produce a movie?—Before I Self-Destruct: To coincide with the release of his new album, 50 Cent, aka Curis Jackson, has decided to make a movie all on his own. Run. Run Fast. Even with In America director Jim Sheridan, Get Rich or Die Trying was a terrible mess. Who knows what new heights of tragedy in cinema this film will create. (Release Date Unknown)
See the trailer here

4. Jews Killing Nazis?—Defiance: Edward Zwick, director of kind of cool but kind of stupid films The Last Samurai or Blood Diamond, has a new film this winter, but it looks pretty good. Daniel Craig, aka 007, stars as a Jew during WWII who decides to rebuild society while fighting the Nazis. Action is Zwick’s specialty, but without any politics to really deal with, this could be a great film. (December 12th)
Watch the trailer here